Mon, 5 December 2011
In this episode I cover the Appendix - Parenting Styles: The Relevance of Culture, Class, and Race in the book Unconditional Parenting: Moving From Rewards And Punishments To Love And Reason by Alfie Kohn
Love is both a feeling and a need
When parents spank children, they inflict pain and induce fear in them, i.e., fear of parental "authority," which sends a really confused and contradictory message to them about their own individuality and choice--and it perversely mixes notions of love with violence. Basically, violating the rights of children doesn't help them flourish.
Lenient parenting methods are just as lopsided as punitive parenting methods. They don't teach children respectful ways to express feelings and get needs met, while meeting the needs of others. It's important for parents to express their feelings in relation to their unmet needs, and be advocates for getting their needs met as much as children do.
Many thanks to Alfie Kohn for putting such a book of useful information about parenting into the world. May the memes of unconditional parenting spread far and wide, so that adults learn that there are life-enriching, win/win ways to get needs met in families, and children therefore grow up healthy and happy. :)
Youth Voices on Peacemaking and Conflict Resolution
Marshall Rosenberg 6-09 When Authority Destroys Creativity from NVC Training Course
bumper music "Joyful Wonder" by Ott
to comment, please go to http://completeliberty.com/magazine/category/91697
Direct download: Episode_154_-_Unconditional_parenting_part_fifteen.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:02pm EDT